i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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