if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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