I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
