Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
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