this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
