I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I think my moral compass just broke
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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