I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
