I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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