she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Acid is not a monday night drug
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize