Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize