Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize