I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
