Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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