She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
