For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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