every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
