I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
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We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
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