Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize