i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
