she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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