shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
