That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
