Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"

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(949): View more from California

im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder

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(314): View more from Missouri

I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(360): View more from Washington

He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.

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(912): View more from Georgia

Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?

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(626): View more from California

I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption

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(585): View more from New York

Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$

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