well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
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He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
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I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$