those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
