Just fell off a train. Bad.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Randomize