We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
bring money and cleavage
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Randomize
