Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
