who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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