I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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