Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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