I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
