That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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