She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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