party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
