Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
This house was built for laser tag.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
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