East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
worst night to have a conscience
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize