Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
