do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize