YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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