So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
