Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
vagina is talking i cant
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
