I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
