): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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