i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
