He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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