i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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