You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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