just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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