I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
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I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
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On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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