I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip ๐๐๐
Your skills amaze me
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, thereโs still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
