is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize