omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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